31.3.05

Weeping Willow (Melancholy) - likes to be stress free, loves family
life,
full of hopes and dreams, attractive, very empathetic, loves anything
beautiful, musically inclined, loves to travel to exotic places,
restless,
capricious, honest, can be influenced but is not easy to live with
when
pressured, sometimes demanding, good intuition, suffers in love until
they
find that one loyal, steadfast partner; loves to make others
laugh.
[It's a birthday-tree thing I got from an e-mail. Quite interesting, I've always been attracted to Weeping Willows, and I think this gets me right at the heart, no?]

tea is served @ 9:47 p. m. --------------------------------------------------------------

"Deep enough to dream in brilliant colours of undying truth."
[From a pretty, random, Christian rock song.]

Abbastanza

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30.3.05

You have to learn the rules of the game. And then you have to play better than anyone else.

Better the rule of One, whom all obey, than to let clamorous demagogues betray our freedom with the kiss of anarchy.

Justice is a concept. Muscle is the reality.

In war, events of importance are the result of trivial causes.

To the old, the new is usually bad news.

Talk not of wasted affection, affection never was wasted.

No one ever discovers the depths of his own loneliness.

The fool thinks himself to be wise, but the wise man knows himself to be a fool.

[Measure For Measure]God does not ask about our ability, but our availability.

Remote and ineffectual don.

When the heart grieves over what is has lost, the spirit rejoices over what it has left.

Facts are the most important thing in business.

Study facts and do more than is expected of you.

Precept guides, but example draws.

I will praise any man that will praise me.

To love one that is great, is almost to be great one's self.

Live on doubts it becomes madness or stops entirely as soon as we pass from doubt to certainty.

The most common lie is that which one lies to himself, lying to others is relatively an exception.

I call the discourse of power any discourse that engenders blame, hence guilt, in its recipient.

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But. . . I feel so low with things. Nothing feels Exciting anymore. Surely, soccer has been beyond awesome so far, but I only get hyped up, for it, for games.

For the most part, I blame routine. Of course schedules are great because you have a plan and have an idea of what you're going to do. Spontaneous is wonderfully splendid though. I love to go do something out of the ordinary. Wake up, get ready for the day, and run off to some where. I just want to get away and not feel "responsible" for at least a day. I can't take care of all my obligations because I have no flame to light my mind up and give me candlelight in order to do it. I feel like someone's been drinking that candlelight and I can't find or stop them.

Routine is just a horrible thing. Always the same things happening and all around you turns from a bright sunny day into a day of greyness and gloom. . . I should have left with Nanci, yeah I could have been kicked off the team and all, but it surely would have made Spring Break lots more exciting. Or maybe I should just try to do something with someone, hmm? Get out of my shell. All, it's all, because I'm so restless, uhhhhh.

tea is served @ 11:51 a. m. --------------------------------------------------------------

29.3.05

Ne lam keMagha

That which the Fascists hate above all else, is intelligence.

Deep versed in books and shallow in himself. Beauty is a short-lived tyranny.

Diplomacy is the art of letting someone have your way.

We are digging our graves with our teeth.

Time dissipates to shining ether the solid angularity of facts.

Don't wait to be a great man -- be a great boy.

The budget evolved from a management tool into an obstacle to management.

To provoke dreams of terror in the slumber of prosperity has become the moral duty of literature.

A king's son is no nobler than his company.

Children suck the mother when they are young and the father when they are old.

Rather fail with honor than succeed by fraud.

In a minute there is time for decisions and revisions which a minute will reverse.

What is interesting about self-analysis is that it leads nowhere -- it is an art form in itself.

Catch on fire with enthusiasm and people will come for miles to watch you burn.

Cheat me in the price, but not in the goods.

The most satisfying thing in life is to have been able to give a large part of oneself to others.

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28.3.05

[Today's game is at Glaecer Park at 4:30, and I don't no where that is. . . But! Our next home game is on the 30th, this Wednesday at 4:30, and I surely do know where that is^_^]

"Let's take a ride and get out of this place while we still have time."
[Jimmy Eats World]

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Chi: and it's like, i was willing to miss my game tomorrow by leaving with Nanci tonight, but i wimped out^^
Lonzio: because you love your sister and don't really get to see her but thought you'd be letting you team down *am I right?*
Chi: Bravo, quite close. . . in fact, i haven't even made up my excuse yet:-D
Lonzio: lol
Lonzio: NOW THAT IS A CLASIC
Lonzio: I haven't even made up my excuse yet
Lonzio: BUT yer close
Chi: ah ha ha ha, and it's so true^^;

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27.3.05

Nhama

The person who writes for fools is always sure of a large audience.

My belief is that no movie, nothing in life, leaves people neutral. You either leave them up or you leave them down.

Force is not a remedy.

Two persons love in one another the future good which they aid one another to unfold.

The bravest thing you can do when you are not brave is to profess courage and act accordingly.

Things will get better -- despite our efforts to improve them.

The greatest education in the world is watching the masters at work.

In my beginning is my end.

Can there be a love which does not make demands on its object?

We never forgive those who make us blush.

Hide not your talents. They for use were made.

What's a sundial in the shade.

He that won't be counseled can't be helped.

The person born with a talent they are meant to use will find their greatest happiness in using it.

The future comes slowly, the present flies and the past stands still forever.

Like all great travelers, I have seen more than I remember and remember more than I have seen.

Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.

The most splendid achievement of all is the constant striving to surpass yourself and to be worthy of your own approval.

The bigger the information media, the less courage and freedom they allow. Bigness means weakness.

tea is served @ 11:34 a. m. --------------------------------------------------------------

The Lord is Risen. Happy Resurrection Sunday!

[Our family tradition is to have a big meal together, like a huge lunch or dinner. Today it's going to be shared with like 3 other families, not the usual Ibe, Ugonna, Ikejimba, but with the Amadi, Charley, Ezurike and Ikejimba. Should be fun, we've done a bunch of cooking and things are set. I just hope everyone else has a blessed day. Paz con uds.

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26.3.05

Let the day be relaxed is my simple prayer. . . Just, Relaaaaaaaaaxed. . .

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25.3.05

Thinking about it, it's not so good but is good, this Friday. Not good because we failed in keeping to God's will and word and strode to our own wishes. I say to be seriously about doing something good in the name of our Father and take things a tad more seriously and keep consequences in mind. Repent and ask for forgiveness of your sins and Always remember that you can do better. In Truth, Seriously, the only thing that ever stops us is ourselves. Yes, we do get provoked, but it's our will that determines all the rest.

Pace[Peace]

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24.3.05

I just allowed her scolding to get me mad and that's why I was on the field sliding into other girls for the ball. I got the aggression out and was willing to kick anyone that came near, though of course I kept my sweet side up.

But, you could be amazed at how powerful you become once you're fired up. Yeah, get mad and convert that into Crazy energy and get down and dirty. Let someone else's passion get you to achieve what you know is right and get to the limits you know you can meet and cross. For without passion, we're all vegetables and fools standing around on the field waiting for what's perfect or good timing. Forget the timing of someone else and just do it.

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23.3.05

It all just feels like the lyrics. . .

(Virtual Insanity, by Jamiroquai)
"Oh yeah, what we're living in (let me tell ya)
It's a wonder man can eat at all
When things are big that should be small
Who can tell what magic spells we'll be doing for us
And I'm giving all my love to this world
Only to be told
I can't see
I can't breathe
No more will we be
And nothing's going to change the way we live
Cos' we can always take but never give
And now that things are changing for the worse
See, it's a crazy world we're living in
And I just can't see that half of us immersed in sin
Is all we have to give these -

[Chorus]
Futures made of virtual insanity
now Always seem to, be
govern'd by this love we have
For useless, twisting, our new
technology Oh, now there is no
sound - for we all live underground

And I'm thinking what a mess we're in
Hard to know where to begin
If I could slip the sickly ties that earthly man has made
And now every mother, can choose the colour
Of her child
That's not natures way
Well that's what they said yesterday
There's nothing left to do but pray
I think it's time I found a new religion
Waoh - it's so insane
To synthesize another strain
There's something in these
Future's that we have to be told

[Chorus]

Now there is no sound
If we all live underground
And now it's virtual insanity
Forget your virtual reality
Oh, there's nothing so bad,
I know yeah

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Keep your ground and do what's right in your heart. If you feel it's time for change, haz, do it. Don't waste any time when you know what should be going on, it's silly not to. . .

[I've just been roaming around singing one of my favourite dance songs, Rapture. When I see the lyrics, it's as if something inside is like "That's what I've been trying to tell you Chichums! We all know you know how to think, pig out on all those words, after skinning them." And I'm just in a better mindframe, it's relaxing. . .

(Rapture, by Iio)
"La lalala lala lalala lala
La lalala lala lalala lala

The night I laid my eyes on you,
Felt everything around me move
Got nervous when you looked my way
But you knew all the words to say.

Then your love slowly moved right in
All this time all my love where you been.

Me, amore don't you know
My love I want you so
Sugar you make my soul complete
Rapture tastes so sweet.

Mesmerised in every way
Keep me in a state of daze
Your kisses make my skin feel weak
Always melting in your heat.

Then I soar like a bird in the wind
Oh I glide as I'm flying through heaven."

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22.3.05

It's the simple question of why didn't you?
Why didn't you run when you knew you probably did have the chance to win?
Why did you feel it best to always jump in and jump out?
From the depths of your heart, will the chase ever be worth it?
But, I must say, you give stubborness best the name. It's just a shame that I do too.

How easily can one destroy the fortress that has the heart of the wind and a support system of stone? Is it not said that through every fortress is a weak point? Where could it be found? Could the rival, one day, finally, find it and break in? And would the turnout be one of bittersweet joy, a freedom for the cold, dark, secrets, or a doomsday?

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21.3.05

"We mortals are but shadows and dust."
[Proximo of Gladiator]

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20.3.05

Happy Palm Sunday. It's the beginning of Holy Week. Look to the Lord during your times of anguish and pain and He will guide you through. All you need to do is believe in faith and peace and love another and also forgive each other of their wrongdoings. Of course, it is hard, but we never know when things for us will end and it's best to rid ourselves of such darkness no matter how tough.

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19.3.05

I never knew I was afraid of dogs, just the big ones. At the party, one of the dogs was by my shoulder, I was on the floor and it was on the couch with its head like On my shoulder and I was "cool."

And then it started to growl because its owner, Brittany, had to move it. And the moment I saw its teeth, after turing to hear it growl, I Moved. I just rolled away, not knowing I was actually rolling/climbing onto Rachel. I was on her for at least a minute until the dog was moved and she told me that I could get off her. I didn't even notice it! I mean, I was Fully on her lap, Clutching her shoulder and I didn't notice it. And when she said to get off, I was ". . . oh. . ."

I was scared, not enough to like pee on myself or something, but filled with enough fear to move without thought. I always was kind of uncomfotable near big dogs, but I never saw it as a "fear." And surely, last night proved me wrong, But it was a classic moment, none of the less.

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Just roaming around singing some Lenny Kravitz. . . Want some lyrics?:

["I Belong to You"]

Before you I was blind
But since I’ve opened my eyes
And with you there’s no disguise
So I could open up my mind
I always loved you from the start
But I could not figure out
That I had to do it everyday
So I put away the fight
Now I’m gonna live my life
Giving you the most in every way
I belong to you
And you
You belong to me too
You make my life complete
You make me feel so sweet

tea is served @ 4:17 p. m. --------------------------------------------------------------

17.3.05

I was asked if cell calls were annoying and they are. It's an awkward atmosphere when someone's on their phone and you're just there knowing you shouldn't be listening or when their like bashing the caller.

It's just not something to be comfortable around you know? Unless it's an emergency, I feel cells should be used in private. I mean, seriously, is it fun to try to work with some one who's on their cell or get on the bus and some random person is blabbing on and on? Well, I know it's not for me^^:. And besides, I've lost lots of precious moments with Lynda because of her cell, and I can't get them back^^. . .

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16.3.05

[Ai, haven't seen this in forever. I went to a Bull's game last night. The United Centre is a CRAZY building. . . I met a British man there, he gave his prize ticket, it's a commercial thing with Hickely Springs and another with Dunkin' Donuts, we had the same number and he was like "Well, I can't take it to Europe with me, so here." and Mum asked "Oh really, where're you from?" And he said "London." And I was like "*_*. . . . I love you." But that was mental and it was admiration. The game was super awesome, even though the Bulls needed those rebounds and didn't aim for them until like 30 sec. left of the 4th quarter and I was like "Rebound!!! Get the Rebound!" and Mum looked at me like "What is wrong with you, silly girl?"]

{On and on, I'm only b*tchy because I'm fed up . . . But anyway, I'm sorrie Erich and, that other guy that was walking with us: : I super sorrie, I think it was Chris A. or something. . : :, that it seemed I blew you all off. It wasn't a pleasant mindframe for me. . .}

Yesterday, on the train, I realised how much I missed the sunset. I don't get to sit down and stare at it anymore. I realised I'm packed and need some time to breathe again. You know you need to take it a tad slower when you forget some of your happy moments. Because, I love to just watch the sunset and dream of how things will be in the future, and me driving with people to random areas like NYC or something. To just daydream, it's so great because no one can inform you of the requirements needed to reach what you want and all you have to do is imagine.

Now, with me and Disney. It's not that I don't believe children shouldn't dream and imagine or something. But, come now, imaginations shouldn't flow in the same stream as greed and pride. Those kids on Disney are always foolish, for the worst reasons, and barely have respect for their parents and I just don't agree with the whole screenplay conduct. It's too "fake" and cliche. There's a difference between imagining and doing well, and just being a spoilt dork. Besides, Disney isn't diverse. All the characters and actors are just the same and doing the same thing. I want a difference and to hear something I've never heard of before.

And I still swear that my children won't watch Disney. There's so much better out there and, also, fun and all that stuff that Disney "provides" can come in various, **cough, better, cough**, forms than what they have. I mean, seriously, don't any of us believe in Foreign Films and all that good stuff? The farthest Disney's gotten with foreign is like Mexico and England. Dude, that's the U.S.'s bloodline right there!

I don't want to have those that I care about eat new forms of lettuce and cabbage. I want them to have the whole salada shindango, including the strawberries and oranges mixed in hither thither. Disney, in the end, is just the same boring stuff of people barely any of the viewers will be, especially if they keep watcing that bunka. . .

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14.3.05

Happy Pi Day!

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"So let go, let go. Jump in. What are you waiting for? It's alright."
[Dido]

Even though Chance is a double sided thing, it's always good to salsa with it. See what happens you make a move and how all things in it will react. Life would be dull without taking a chance here and there. But don't do it for greed, then that's just vain and wrong. No one likes a greedy person, now.

So, wish to know my chance dance? With Chance, we shall dance the Austrian Waltz. It's somewhat slow but amusing. And the music to it will be the questions of my mind and heart. We'll see what becomes of things when I start to pester at the shady gaps in my family. Try to get out all those entanglements of misunderstanding with graceful strides and elegant spins. And at the end of it, I just want to be glad that I took another step and that Most of All, that I tried. . .

Take a chance, do the dance and don't stop 'til you enough!

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13.3.05

So it's been a little teasing thought. Couldn't really ever explain it, but slowly knew my placing of it.

I can't say that I support Gays and Bi's, but I know I won't stand in their way. I mean, I have no basic feeling towards it except that I want those who are to be happy and comfortable with themselves and not feel awkward around me. I surely don't around them.

But I can't shout out the door "Gays Rule!!" and such. In truth, I can't say I support it because I'm not super sure on where my faith stands. We're told to love all those around us, no matter who or what they are. But in Moses' time, such ways were considered wrong, looked down upon, and shunned.

It's just the simple truth that I won't ever hurt someone because of how they are, in that sense, but when it comes to stronger, deeper, things, I know which stone to stand upon. Because it's different when they mess themselves up or purposely change themselves.

Yeah, yeah, we all know of how a radical I was, but it was simply to set a. . . a stand to show that I didn't feel need to act differently or whatever. Indeed, I don't and never try to act as if I'm cool with it, because I don't believe I should be one to dictate who can be with who. Truly, which one of us has the right to tell each other who they can and cannot "be with"?

And when you think about it, we shouldn't have a problem with it though. What if it were switched around. What if the majourity of the world was homosexual and the minority heterosexual? There would still be discrimination there, now wouldn't it? And so, because I know it could be flipped that way, I don't feel need to be a bug-a-boo about it, but I still don't Truly understand Exactly how I should feel about it. In truth, I just want some New opinions on it, more intellectual ones. Again, I'm not saying that I feel it right or wrong, just that it is wrong to shun such people for whom they are, for discrimination is one of the worst things in the world. But I'm not as sure to feel about it as I feel about music. Because, I Love Music, in its various forms and would not last long if I didn't hum a song or at least spasmodic scat here and there. But, I'm not as solidly stand still with homosexuallity. So, just as for now, I'll follow the feelings that my mind and heart press on me, though the two have their own conflicts here and there. [Ain't that right you two?. . . : :in unison: : "Darn skippidy, Chichums!"]

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12.3.05

Ah! I had a weeird dream last night. This one senior at school was at Jewel Osco, and so was I. He came in all drunk and stoned and tried to steal an M&Ms packet and the workers were all like "Hey, man. Put that down, we saw you and you can't get away with it." And then he was acting all cool and then saw me and told me to get to the wall, as he pulled out a gun. Then he told everyone to just get off his back or he'd shoot me. And no one moved, and still me shot me. Or well, I heard a bang, my leg started to hurt and I went down screaming for help.

Then Lonzio popped out of nowhere and the senior guy just vanished. Supposedly, as Alonzo said, I was okay and wasn't shot. But man, all that was going through my head was like "Not like, can't go like this. God help me."

It was just really creepy. I never have violent dreams and that one was an eye-opener for me. I didn't like it. And with me, I do believe that dreams hold a key to future because something similar happened to my Grandmum. She dreamt of her eldest daughter coming into her room and not talking to her, just ignoring her, as Grandmum tried to hold some sort of convo. And then, two days later, she got the news that Sue, the eldest daughter, had died in her sleep.

And then there's the whole Romeo & Juliet thing too. Okay, yeah, I know it's just a story, but you can't deny dreams foretelling the future and all that. I'm just shaky right now. It crept me. . . out. . .

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11.3.05

Okay, just to not make any of that Help Motherland statement seem sensed in the wrong direction, because my words tend to play tricks here and there. . . It's based on a money thing, just a correct your priorities thing. Well, yeah, money is going to pop in here and there, but I'm not trying to say that money makes the world go round, though some make it! But just, come back to the human rights right. . . It'll only cost you time and strength to help someone learn how walk again or at least how it is run, you know? It's just a cry for help, of at least some known sort and to not push back and ignore anymore. . . . yyyeash. . .

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[Rant, it's been a while, okay?^_~]

Man, soccer's really been messing with my mind, I've been building up all these metaphors and philosophical ideas that just work right with things I need to get out. And that's when I'm wheezing on the field through a jog or sprint, you know, when Coach C isn't calling anything out. It's good to just think and do yourself good at the same time.

Oh, I think I need to stop with ice cream. It builds phlem in my throat and that blocks my airways. Which all means I'm hacking it out on the field in order to breathe through my nose, but they can't take away my ice cream. . . Or maybe I should just make it a Good Job Babe thing?

We humans are stupid, stupid things. Smart, darn skippidy yeah, but still stupid. Still laughing at the jerk that criticises ridiculous stuff just for some attention. I say that make the Dunce Cap for them if they want eyes so much. And then there's the thing with how blah something is. Our DNA is crazy long and holds in a great amount of stuff. And all that really matters is what's inside of it. What it holds, not how it appears or its statisitcs for length and size and what it would look like if it were life-size. Because what matters is what's In It!!

And yet they're still people out there trying to see how many females they can fuel their One Minute Passion with and walk away with another name on the trophy. And those that are trying to building the greatest skyscrapers and money, Money, piling in for McDonald's and all that crap that we really don't need. And yet it's still so hard to just place in effort and willingness to help support human rights in other countries, in Africa!, and to just keep people healthy, even in This land.

Darn it, the Motherland needs us, my land needs us, and yet all any practically help country seems to do is pervert its truth and meaning, and make it seem as if we're worthless creatures that kill anyone and anything and don't feed our children. Well, if the world would turn its eyes to seeing that we, Africa, needs advice, help, counselling, support, and better media coverage[at least] then maybe things could shape up. Then maybe you could see that it's Not That We Don't Want to Feed Our Children, or that we willing sell them for prostitution. There those that just have to, Have to make those sacrifices, in order to try to build on some foundation that may still be there in their hearts and minds. Don't think the parents get rid of the kid without any after thoughts. They, We, have feelings, We Know what it's like to actually lose everything that holds meaning. We do and will cry when it's been too much. We're not ignorant, dark skinned, fools that run around chasing giraffes, lions, squirels, and anything that has meat. The only thing that we, that my family back home is doing, is trying to live. And for those that still don't know, yeah the first 3 years of my life dealt with no t.v., walking through rainforest for water, walking miles to school. . . [I didn't need, and some times still don't need, all those electronic crazy things to make me happy. Darn it, just someone, special to me, smiling at me, for me, makes me hyperly-happy. Some one screaming out all night that they love me makes me squeal like a fool!]

But anyway, back to the humans things and all. . . .That greed is a leading way of why and how Love and Help are euphanisms for "barter with me for what I want/need" hince Want is before Need for a reason *Ahem*. America needs to get its fat, greedy, ignorant @$$ out of Iraq and turn to Rwanda and Burundi and Sudan and Ethiopia were people actually Need You! Leave all that crappie fuel where is it, it's messing up the air anyway and the rainforests never come back easily.

Man, I've got stuff. . . I can talk too!. . .{Spams. . . .}

Kids at school need to shut up, do their work, and put in effort for themselves and the school. Stop making those who actually do try to give in effort have to make Majour decisions because barely anyone is doing anything anyway. I had to quit yearbook so I could give the Girl's Soccer teams another student, athlete, to believe in. Do Something, where ever you are. Don't make those who wish to not Break Commitments have to, it's infinitely harder than it sounds. A commitment is practically a sacred bond that some times only death can/should break. So what, people aren't doing anything and screaming of how they don't care, what about your teachers, eh? Think your "Screw it, I don't care" modes are really giving them reasons to come back everyday or at least try to make silabus interesting for us? Seriously, if you don't try to find your fuel now, how are you going to turn out right at all? How are you going to know, how you have to be, when others need you and you're graded by your heart and "passing" may mean nothing to you, but Surely isn't to others?

I know I have my "People can think what they want" moments but that's because I know where I want to go, need to do, am aiming for. I'm not sitting around trying to be some image that I'm not or just rotting in my bed or chair. I have the right to say that because I've found who I am. I know what I need, and I surely don't need negativity along with ignorant stupidity. I need humility yes, but not constant doubt in me or whoever you are or at least feel to be. If you don't have footing, how can you stand up and shout?. . . .

Man, I talk to myself a Lot. I say Waaaay better things when no one's around, even when Lonzio's isn't around. Yeah, even you, Lonzio. . .

[Majour Spasm Rant]But Gosh! Please don't make me feel like crap. Smiles are beautiful and natural, Use Them People!!! Please don't make me regret showing how I can be, if tomorrow's just nothing to you. Please don't make me feel like a fool for the random things I've done. Please have appreciation towards that give effort others give, into just knowing you. And if not, leave them alone. Don't allow the enchanted to be heartbroken, hurt, and cry because of that concept of "reality." Come and believe, dream, just fade away from the pollution and meditate on fancy, sweet, calming ideas and get a sense of what it's truly like to not feel a thing and just be content.

Please don't make me cry anymore. . .
[Uh, you must forgive me for ending it like that. Josh, LinZ, and Chris know that mode I've been in of recent and don't get to "I know what she's talking about" because it's double sided. Forgive me for concluding my rant like that, but I just kind of got a tad gloomy. Don't Worry! I'm going to be Cool and Alright!]

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10.3.05

Good courage in a bad affair is half of the evil overcome.

Love is rarer than genius itself. And friendship is rarer than love.

We become actors without realizing it, and actors without wanting to.

Nothing is impossible to the man who will.

I am a great believer in luck and the harder I work the more of it I have.

The expectations of life depend upon diligence.

The mechanic that would perfect his work must first sharpen his tools.

A linguistic system is a series of differences of sound combined with a series of differences of ideas.

The law helps those who watch, not those who sleep.

Giving opens the way for receiving.

The fear of death often proves mortal, and sets people on methods to save their Lives, which infallibly destroy them.

The art of creation is older than the art of killing.

Feed your faith and doubt will starve to death.

The Extra Mile will have no traffic jams.

Life is a bridge. Cross over it, but build no house on it.

Never celebrate until you are really out of the woods. They might be behind the last tree.

Every business is built on friendship.

My center is giving way, my right is in retreat situation excellent. I shall attack.

Every artist writes his own autobiography.

tea is served @ 12:02 a. m. --------------------------------------------------------------

[I marked up the ones that got me good or just got me to laugh at its meaing, enjoy and I'll post in due time.]

Humorists can never start to take themselves seriously.

It's literary suicide.

Bureaucracy is a giant mechanism operated by pygmies.

All things come from above.

The only place where your dream becomes impossible is in your own thinking.

If it's not growing, it's going to die.

In making a living today, many no longer leave room for life.

If your words are soft and sweet, they won't be as hard to swallow if you have to eat them.

There are things of deadly earnest that can only be mentioned under the cover of a joke.

That so few now dare to be eccentric, marks the chief danger of the time.

Genius is an infinite capacity for taking pains.

Fashion, by which what is really fantastic becomes for a moment the universal.

Law is a bottomless pit.

Divorce is a game played by lawyers.

If you are going to build something in the air it is always better to build castles than houses of cards.

The very aim and end of our institutions is just this: that we may thing what we like and say what we think.

Any affectation whatsoever in dress implies, in my mind, a flaw in the understanding.

Everyone who has ever built anywhere a ''new heaven'' first found the power thereto in his own hell.

Do that which is assigned to you and you cannot hope too much or dare too much.

tea is served @ 12:00 a. m. --------------------------------------------------------------

9.3.05

[One of Those E-Mails, ¡otro vez!]

The clash of ideas is the sound of freedom.

There are no better masters than poverty and wants.

Fame is proof that the people are gullible.

There's something contagious about demanding freedom.

Gratitude -- the meanest and most sniveling attribute in the world.

Love is full of anxious fears.

Beauty is a harmonious relation between something in our nature and the quality of the object which delights us.

We are what we imagine ourselves to be.

Every time a child says, ''I don't believe in fairies,'' there is a fairy somewhere that falls down dead.

Beauty of style and harmony and grace and good rhythm depends on simplicity.

Outward judgment often fails, inward judgment never.

He who sleeps in continual noise is wakened by silence.

We come and cry and that is life, we cry and go and that is death.

What we anticipate seldom occurs, what we least expected generally happens.

There are seventy million books in American libraries, but the one you want is always out.

Indignation is a submission of our thoughts, but not of our desires.

We look upon the enemy of our souls as a conquered foe, so he is, but only to God, not to us.

As long as men are liable to die and are desirous to live, a physician will be made fun of, but he will be well paid.

tea is served @ 11:58 p. m. --------------------------------------------------------------

Pain is worth it, always is. You grow and become stronger, mentally and physically. Just apply yourself to it and make sure you learn something, even if it's only that you don't like it. Do something to make it not happen again or so, yeah? We all still have a bunch of growing to do, keep together and you'll pull through.

tea is served @ 7:25 p. m. --------------------------------------------------------------

8.3.05

[Nancy gave me a Happy Half B-Day message, ever so glad. Yeeeah!]

It's great to come to recognition with who you are and what you're doing. All your life people can tell you all this good stuff and you think you're the best and then comes your day of reckoning. You feel like "Okay, I can do this. It's not so bad, let's kick it!" And then you find you're far behind and the only way to reach those ahead of you is to push beyond what you thought was your boundary. You have to kick your self good to finally come into recognition with your true worth. Don't listen to all those others, they're not in your mind, helping you with all your decisions, how deeply do they know your being?

You always need to find your inner light. For whom can you turn to in a crowded hallway and those around you are not of your acknowledgement. You have to learn to pick yourself, love yourself, and stay strong. Kick that pessimism out of your life and get a glimpse of that lovely bright side, it's always there.

tea is served @ 7:04 p. m. --------------------------------------------------------------

5.3.05

*From "I've heard a lot about you"*

A lover without indiscretion is no lover at all.

Circumspection and devotion are a contradiction in terms.

The anarchist and the Christian have a common origin.

A real Christian is a person who can give his pet parrot to the town gossip.

I am a part of everything that I have read.

Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.

Absence -- that common cure of love.

The physically fit can enjoy their vices.

I don't wait for moods.

You accomplish nothing if you do that.

Your mind must know it has got to get down to earth.

The joy in life is to be used for a purpose.

I want to be used up when I die.

The man who graduates today and stops learning tomorrow is uneducated the day after.

You will never win if you never begin.

An affair wants to spill, to share its glory with the world.

No act is so private it does not seek applause.

Exuberance is beauty.

Romances I never read like those I have seen.

Love in marriage should be the accomplishment of a beautiful dream, and not, as it too often is, the end.

If you can give your son or daughter only one gift, let it be enthusiasm.

Beauty is a good letter of introduction.

Be great in act, as you have been in thought

tea is served @ 2:29 p. m. --------------------------------------------------------------

[I keep getting these random e-mails from people I don't know. But, inside are insiteful quotes that I found interest in. Here's a few:]

From "Bonjour":
There is only one failure in life possible, and that is not to be true to the best one knows.

Fame often makes a writer vain, but seldom makes him proud.

The cow is of the bovine ilk: One end is moo, the other, milk.

An angry man opens his mouth and shuts his eyes.

All work and no play makes one the wealthiest man in the cemetery.

Like everything metaphysical the harmony between thought and reality is to be found in the grammar of the language.

Those that are the loudest in their threats are the weakest in their actions.

Keep thy smooth words and juggling homilies for those who know thee not.

'Tis the last rose of summer, left blooming alone all her lovely companions are faded and gone.

The best vitamin for making friends, B-1.

It takes a wise man to handle a lie, a fool had better remain honest.

A skilful leech is better far, than half a hundred men of war.

Art is skill, that is the first meaning of the word.

Life too near paralyses art.

Subtlety may deceive you integrity never will.

One had better die fighting against injustice than die like a dog or a rat in a trap.

How is the Empire?

No ear can hear nor tongue can tell the tortures of the inward hell!

Interesting, are they not?

tea is served @ 11:08 a. m. --------------------------------------------------------------

4.3.05

[Ah, thank God that things have settled. I didn't want to be submissive, yet not stubborn towards it all. I'm so glad that it's trickling, it's so great. And I wasn't planning on staying mad at anyone, you know, it was just like a rebuttal.]

But moving on, have you read on Rwanda? There's been a horrible genocide and most countries that could do something haven't. The U.S. didn't because there isn't anything in Rwanda and Burundi that would benefit the economy, and that was in Clinton's time. It's crazy, these countries aren't doing anything because of lack of materialistic rewards. That's total baddie aura, man.

Like the reason is because of the two tribes that reside there. The minority one has power from Belgium, because Belgium built a colony there and then moved out and gave the Tutsi the power. They gave the minority group the power because they found the Tutsis most appealing, pretty, beautiful things. The Hutu didn't like that and revolted.

But my main reason of being so into it is because I've just grown to love and accept the huge fact that Africa is my heart land, Nigerian Pride! It's my place and I need to know what's going on and enough with all these U.S. history stuff, I feel I know enough about the U.S. I need to know about my home land and bring support to it, because it's a part of me and I can't deny it. My face, without the markings, may deny it now, but the markings left on my chest and back surely could never lie, you dig? And I love it's Rich history, through the good and bad. When you love something, like toast, you have to love the burnt parts and all the crumbs at the bottom of the toaster, because it's love.

tea is served @ 7:03 p. m. --------------------------------------------------------------

3.3.05

So glad the weekend's here. . .

tea is served @ 6:08 p. m. --------------------------------------------------------------

Fully aware that I may have contradicted myself, but I deeply wanted to take a stand. Seriously, let's all just work this out and get done with it so we know what to do when other things happen, hmm?

tea is served @ 7:06 a. m. --------------------------------------------------------------

2.3.05

Yeah, yeah, bloody yeah, so it's "Okay" to say what you feel. But does it feel good to get dissed by those you always felt were close to you because you decided to say All of how you felt? I don't think so.

I, Chichi, totally support those who have been coming up and being like "Yeah, this is me, I'm [gay, lesi,bi] and yeah." Because you know what, you have more power for you've got more of the pieces of yourself in order. You've got more guts in doing it.

. . . Forget all those geezers that are bringing super negative comments in about it. I mean, my good sapphire, it's discrimination! How can someone so close to you not even want to speak to you anymore or feel that you've ruined their life because you came out? I mean, think about it, You have much more pressure placed on you for finally being who you are than those who, use to, have the right to "Yeah, that's my friend/buddy/pal" whatever.

Such being cannot be questioned, for they can change their feelings inside as much as they can change their skin colour and soul. It's pretty frickin' hard and intolerable at moments. How dare anyone pop out of no where and act as if it's the end of their world, for it's only begun bigots. I mean, seriously, is Exactly No One putting themselves in the body of the other? Has freedom of speech been transformed into Say What You Want Without a Bloody Care About How Someone Else May Feel, Because Your Feelings/ Ideas Are So Much More Important Than Them? What happened to saying their your friend because you love and care about them?

Evidently, you shouldn't even say anything remotely close to "friend" as a classification with them if you turn into a super monster over how they are. Seriously, this is very much similar to the Civil Rights Movement because it's neighbour against neighbour because of how a neighbour is and they can't change themselves because of close minded prejudice that doesn't seem to ever die. It's a morbid form of racism. It's disgusting. My conscience is spinning with sickness and anger!

Why does it matter that they're gay or bi or whatever? Evidently, if they didn't hit on you before you found out, what on earth would make you think up [blah!] that pertains to them automatically start groping you because you finally know? That is pure bull from someone that has not seen enough of the world to say something to be considered a speaker of any sort other than prejudice.

And to all those that did, I love you for allowing me to get a little bit closer to each of you, for who you are and how you chose to bring your inner light about. For, there areway older people that are still debating how to come even any where near close to what you all have done. Seriously, with pure meaning, Forget All Of Them That Even Say Anything Nega. About You Or This in General, For They Must Not Have a Clue. Don't listen to their crap one single bit.

tea is served @ 11:32 p. m. --------------------------------------------------------------

Yeah, Ryan growing really isn't what it's cracked up to be. It's does get wack at times, and then you just want to go back to running in the playground and getting all dirty and never really noticing anything at all. Ha, those were the good old days.

But, let's start to look at tomorrow with a smile, here and there, hmm? Isn't it exciting to know thawt you can be more in control of the things you do? Get live out with friends or on your own and be practically the person you've always wanted to be.

I just love getting to know new things. Gaining knowledge about stuff and gaining self confidence and being my own person. So yes, things are harder and people aren't as sweet anymore. It doesn't matter if you've found your strengths and just don't listen to it all.

Just dream about what's to come. I'm not saying Live in the Dream, just advicing to dream and not notice the black spotches on your shirt/blouse. Yeah stuff happens and messes up your day, but thankfully we can always look to tomorrow with barely any worries.

You always have to lose when you gain. So make sure you gain the right things, eh? The loss won't be so brutal. And just enjoy this huge chess game or its series. If you aim for the right stuff, the path of least resistence, and find your foundations and anchors, it'll be a journey/ game to remember. Find your bright sides, shining sun, sparkling night time diamonds and the moon with its beams. Take back the beauty of the imperfect and pick each other up. Daily falls aren't so horrid when you have someone to fall against or just laugh about it with.

We have to stay strong, but the weak still have their glory. . .

tea is served @ 8:26 p. m. --------------------------------------------------------------

1.3.05

[Sonya, I need that Recital!]

It's just so dramatic, is it necessary?

tea is served @ 5:56 p. m. --------------------------------------------------------------